What was supposed to be.

Today is your due date.  The day that I was supposed to meet you, hold you and kiss you for hours.  Today was the day our family was supposed to be complete. For reasons still unknown to us, that is not the case.  I wanted to let you know that there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about you. We had so many hopes and dreams for your future.  God is getting to share all of those milestones and memories with you.  You are free. I hope that when you look down on us, we make you proud.  I try every day to be the person that you are proud to call mom. Until we meet again, I love you my sweet angel.

Mom

While these past few months have been hard and a hole in my heart will never be replaced, I have found joy in the little moments that I once took for granted.  Mallory and Chuck have continued to be the shining spotlights in the many blessings that have been brought to my life.  While I could stay focused on the things I do not have and the hardships I have faced, I try to focus on the blessings I have been given.  Some days are harder than others to focus on the have’s rather than the have not’s.  Some wishes just aren’t going to be granted and we’ll never get answers to those.  God has brought many people into my life to help me through this journey.  He has reconnected me with old friends and strengthened bonds with new friends.  Even today I was reminded of God’s work through one of them.

God didn't promise
days without pain
laughter without sorrow
or sun without rain.
But God did promise
strength for the day,
comfort for the tears
and a light for the way,
And for all who believe
in His kingdom above,
He answers their faith
with everlasting love.
Thanks to all those who have been there for shoulders to cry on and constant prayers sent our way.  We know that the journey is not over, but through your help we have taken many steps forward. 



"Without darkness, we may never know how bright the stars shine.  Without battles, we could not know what victory feels like.  Without adversity, we may never appreciate the abundance in our lives.  Be thankful not only for the easy times, but for every experience that has made you who you are."